online dating

Taking The Plunge -Well Almost

 I’ve decided to take my friend’s advice and put myself out there, so I’m taking the plunge and starting my new sassy lifestyle of dating. But where do you even start? People keep telling me to get myself online. I’m not sure what it is about online dating but it seems to have a stigma attached to it and most of us, including myself think that the only people online are weirdos. Surely if you can’t find someone in the real world you must be loopy. But then again, I can’t find anyone in the real world so I must be loopy. (please don’t comment on that in the comments box, it’s never been proven).

So I’m doing it, I’m in my 30’s and it’s time to grow up. I take a seat in my dining room preparing myself for the plunge, laptop…check, coffee…check, quirky personality…check, handsome hunks.. soon to be checked.

As I scroll through all of the sites and see which ones would be best, I think I’ll try a free one to start with, after all I’m not wasting my money on this. I actually feel a little nervous and not 100% sure I want to do it, I mean spinsters have fun, right?…Also, if I entered into a relationship what would happen to my girly nights out? I’d have to make an extra meal for someone, I’d have to clean up after them. No stop this, Mr Negativity is not creeping in this time. Come on, register yourself, it’s only a few clicks away.

Question 1 – Your name – Ee I can’t tell them my name, that would be embarrassing. What if someone I know went on there and thought, hey, that’s what’s her face I went to school with. No, I’m definitely not telling them my name. I’ll have to make one up. Louise, right, that’s now my new name.

Question 2 – Location – Ee I’m not telling them where I live they might stalk me, after all, it is full of weirdos. My new location is now Jarrow. So I’m now Louise from Jarrow.

Question 3 – Any dependants – Ee I’m not telling them I have a son, they might be pedophiles and only contact me because they know I have a child. No, I do not have any children.

Question 4 – What do you do for a living? – I could tell them that I suppose as it’s only a little bit of information, but I’ll just put admin for now and explain later what it is I actually do.

The Constant questions go on and on and to be honest with you (which right now is something I haven’t been while filling in my details) I’m getting really bored of it.

Finally, that’s it, 3rd cup of coffee has been drunk and all questions have been answered (not exactly honestly, but they have been answered) and I’m ready to start, when all of a sudden it flashes up for me to add a picture. No way am I adding my picture to this thing, people would see me (well, I’m sure that’s the point). But no, I am definitely not adding my photographs to this site at all.

So I’m now online posing as Louise from Jarrow and nobody is allowed to look at me. Actually do you think there could be the slightest chance they have guessed what I look like behind the silhouette figure. Maybe I should log in as a man and make up a male profile just to see if I have given anything away on my profile. Oh, don’t be so silly come on, you’re here looking for a date not a split personality.

My profile is now online – I’d like to say it’s there in all it’s glory, but come on, the only information I am happy to give these men is my age and that’s the one thing us women should lie about. 

So I wait, and I wait, and I wait….oo someone has messaged me, errr he has a beard and his chest is out, I’m not even talking to him…I’m going to be good at this I can tell!!!!!


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